Dealing with Hate and Disrespect as Baddies in STEM

As women, as women in STEM, as content creators, as humans, we all get hate and disrespect- sometimes seemingly on a continuous basis. It can be so easy to let it get to us and get us down and feeling bad about ourselves. Here are some tips to NOT let them win so you can stay confident in yourself and your abilities. When you develop thicker skin life gets better, baddies. Just don't let it make you bitter!!

Do not let things that people say harden you. That lets them win.

Staying soft and authentically you yet being firm with your boundaries is how we take back our power as women and not let people, especially the men that we work with, treat us with any kind of disrespect 💁🏼‍♀️

Now how do we do this? How do we stand our ground and enforce boundaries while staying feminine?

When it comes to hate comments online, we can either ignore them or if we feel a response is needed, we can respond with a witty and cheeky yet firm remark- not stooping to their level. I personally just delete any hateful comments that come my way because I do not care to take the time to argue with those who will never acknowledge you winning... No matter how right you are. We all know people like this. It seems like the whole internet is like this! So when people are being unreasonably negative, do NOT stoop to their level! They are just miserable and have way too much free time, that's why they are trolling on the internet girl. You are so much better than them. Don't give them the time of day.

This can also apply to disrespect at work or in life. If the group of guys you work with say something slightly rude about women, you can either shake your head and walk away deciding that expending your energy in that moment is not worth it, or if this continues, use your voice and put a stop to it. If everyone is laughing at a racist or sexist joke, choose to stand up for yourself or others and say 'I don't find that funny.' With the blankest stare you can muster. And if they try to make you feel bad for it, ask why it is even funny in the first place. When you ASK A QUESTION it puts the ball in their court instead of yours. Making them uncomfortable. I love to act dumb and ask questions like this around the old, ignorant men I work with. It really bothers them that I kiki with them at any other time and chat football etc., but when they say anything disrespectful about women or anyone else- all the niceties are gone. You will not talk that way around me.

Asking the other person a question when confronted with disrespect is the best thing to do

because the other person is usually looking for a rouse out of you. So when you put the spotlight back on them, you show them that you are unbothered and, hopefully, having that spotlight on their comment will make them feel uncomfortable instead.

Staying unbothered is key. When we use calm yet assertive language, we assert our dominance over the conversation in a feminine way that demands respect from others.

How do we become and stay unbothered??

The number one way to be unbothered and not let disrespect / hate get to you is to be 

Confident & Authentically You

which is exactly what we stand for here at STEM Baddies!! 

When you are so sure of yourself and know who you are, it is much harder for anyone or anything to take you down. Any hateful comment will roll right off of you because you know it’s not true and you know it’s just hate coming from a wound on their end, not yours. 

A big way to level up your confidence and authenticity is to 

 take the time to learn more about yourself. 

1. What are you good at?

2. What do you want out of life?

3. What bothers you about yourself?

   1. Finding your own shadows and limitations is so important because once you shine light on them they hold less power. Especially when someone else tries to point them out to hurt you. Journal, talk to a friend, talk to yourself. Figure out who YOU are so that nobody else can tell you what you are or what you’re not. #period

   2. Like I have hairy arms. If anyone points this out to me I will just say 'Yeah, I do.' And it won't get to me because I already know this and accept this about myself.

If you ladies need help in this area, we do offer mentorship and coaching through STEM Baddies! Please DM us or book on our website so that you can become your best baddie self and put these men in their place. 💁🏼‍♀️